I Survived Mexicans at the May Day Rally

In Current Events, Human Rights and the Constitution, Humor on May 1, 2011 at 21:22

Mexican Americans scaring us by fighting for their rights on May Day from http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x8253293

Dear Real Americans:

I survived a horrifying experience this weekend. I was trying to hire some labor down on the Southside to clean out the septic tanks at my various properties in the county, and I landed smack dab into the May Day rally. I’m not talking about young girls in Easter dresses dancing around a May pole, no sirree. I’m talking about a group of marching illegals coming up the avenue with signs supporting rights and what not. They were interfering with my free enterprise creating jobs and such for their people. Can’t they see how their actions of unity hurts America?

How do I know they were illegals? The signs promoted “Derechos Humanos” and other foreign ideas in their foreign language. They also chanted scary things in Mezkin like “El Puerquo, You Need Those, Ham and a Vegetable” (1), and “Obama, excuse us, it is in la Lunch. (2)” I don’t understand what kind of lunch they were demanding, but I was ready to take them all to Taco Bell for real Mexican cuisine if they came after me.

I can’t tell you whether there were any dyed in the wool, true blue Americans there, cause all I could focus on was the dark skinned folks. I knew they were up to no good cause they were chanting, and singing and drumming and dancing and showing a signs of unity that the Koch brothers pay for at the Tea Party rallies (link). I wonder what left wing communist organization was paying these Mezkins to threaten us. I bet the Taliban are behind it.

I made the mistake of getting out of my Chevy and got swept up in the crowd and ended up at their rallying point, a kind of illegal immigrant Nuremberg. I had to plug my ears as I heard things in perfect English (obviously due to their Taliban training) as they shouted things like “education for everyone”, “defend ethnic studies”, and “working together.”  They even stole from the Tea Party phrase book and talked about “defending our culture.” I felt the apocalypse flow over me like nuclear radiation in a tsunami.

As I stumbled out of the “kill the gringo rally” in a daze, only a few radical liberals brain washed by their God Obama, noticed me. They pushed their petitions at me to support ethnic studies, impeach Jan Brewer, or to take their “Save the Teachers” buttons. I knew that God was testing me, and only God’s hatred of illegals propelled me to find my car.

Luckily, I knew of a camp of homeless people where I could get people to work for me cleaning out my sewage. I am a businessman, and I had to create jobs for America.

The chants actually say:
1. “El Pueblo Unido, Jamas’ Sera’ Vencido” (The people united with never be defeated) and
2. “Escucha Obama, Estamos en la Lucha” (Listen Obama, we are in the fight)
but Tex doesn’t know any better.

Tex Shelters

  1. I’m not exactly for illegal immigration, but I doubt that our globalist government cares about such things in the very least. If anyone does think that because they are “white,” (I loathe the term “white” as a descriptor of a human being) and therefore, a “true American,” then perhaps they should learn about the struggles of the Irish in Boston in the 19th and even into the 20th century.

    • I’m pinky-beige. White rhinos are gray. It’s a conspiracy by the color “white.” Sesame Street was brought to you today by the number six, the letter B and the color white.

      • Polar bears are actually ivory.

        Serious, they have, or had, 13 distinctions of color for Afro-Brazilians in Brazil and that didn’t cover the other 200 million shades.

        I prefer the shade “translucent” or “sickly salmon” thanks. Or call me a Euro-socialist Irish American white trash.

        Tex Shelters

        • I’m a vegan, Tex, otherwise I’d go with sickly-salmon for you. You’ll have to share pinky-beige. Euro-socialist Irish…etc sounds insulting enough but it’s simply too long.

  2. Wes,

    Yes, you are correct. Too bad many in the Republican party use fear of immigrants (when they have no fear at all) to manipulate people for votes and support for discriminatory laws.

    Tex Shelters

  3. Escucha,Tejasito, estamos en la lucha.

    देखते-सुनते, टेक्सास, हम की लडाई में

    (The same in Hindi. Well, mostly. Couldn’t figure out how to call you “Little Texas” in Hindi. If I called you something terrible by accident, I didn’t mean to 😉

    Don’t look now but scary little brown people all around the world are starting to influence more and more little European-American people…

    Hope you had a wonderful May Day.

  4. I hoped to scare heck out of you what Archie Bunker called “regular people” by writing my comment in Hebrew. That’ll larn ’em, I thought. But I couldn’t get the aleph-bet to replicate here! I need to speak to my world-taking-over cohorts about that. What’s the world coming to when we can’t frighten some real American regular people with some scarifying Hebrew? Sheesh!

    • להקשיב, טקסס, אנחנו במאבק

      (Note: There is a slight risk of accidentally causing international incidents when one uses online translators.)

      • Hebrew is scary, unless you are an ultra-right nationalist in Israel writing up plans to invade Iran. Cause what’s really scary is them Arab and Islamists.

        Ich mochte Berliners! (I like jelly donuts).

        Tex Shelters

  5. Are you in Texas, Little Sun?

  6. Oh noez! What color do you get when you cross a Far East Asian and a Caucasian Eastern European? I guess since I resemble Native Americans, but I’m not, I’ll just have to keep “graham cracker”. Does that sound bad enough? I don’t know. But I would suggest NOT dipping me into any holy guacamole.

  7. Likamarie,

    How about “Sesame Cracker”?

    Check out these from “Ask a Mexican”:

    If you’re half-Mexican and. . .
    Half-African: Afrijoles.

    Half-Arab:Garbanzo beaner, America’s worst nightmare.
    Half-British: Limey beans
    Half-Cajun: Bayou Beaner,
    Half-Chinese: Chexican,
    Half-Costa Rican: Mextica (“tico” is a nickname for Costa Ricans).
    Half-Czech:Czecano, Czex-Mex, Czexican, Mexislovakian.
    Half-Eskimo: Mexkimo
    Half-Irish: , green bean, Irlandicanos, Leprecano, McBeaner, McSpic, O’Beaner…


    Tex Shelters

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